Coping with sudden loss
An unexpected death is a shock that can stay in the body long after the mind has caught up. The aim of this page is not to fix anything — it is simply to remind you that what you are feeling is part of the process.
Shock has a job to do
In the first hours and days, shock buffers the mind. You may feel oddly calm, or numb, or unable to settle. This is your nervous system protecting you while it takes in the impact.
Practical things first
In sudden deaths there is often a coroner involved, and the timeline can shift. Do not try to plan beyond the next 24 hours. We will walk you through each step as it becomes clear.
“You do not have to be strong. You only have to take the next small step.”
Letting people in
Friends and family often want to help but do not know how. Specific asks help — a meal, a school pickup, a phone call answered. It is fair to say what you need.
When grief surfaces
Once shock starts to thaw — sometimes weeks in — grief can arrive in waves. Counselling, peer support, and a steady GP can be invaluable. We can point you to services in your area.
